Satisfied

Yesterday, my mom and I went to see the movie "Eat, Pray, Love", starring Julia Roberts. While I thought the movie was great, it made me a little depressed. Julia Roberts' character, Liz, gives up her job, her husband and pretty much her whole life so she can go "find herself." She travels to Italy, India and Bali and lives in each country for an extended period of time. At each destination, Liz makes a new revelation either about herself, or life in general. I won't spoil the movie for those of you who want to see it, and have not yet had the chance to, but I will say this. No matter where Liz went, and no matter what she did, she was NEVER satisfied. She always wanted something more, or something different. 

This is where things got depressing for me, well at least for a little while. I was sad that someone who had such a rich life could be so unhappy, and she was mostly unhappy with herself. Then it hit me, while this character Liz was searching for herself, she also was searching for God (she did a lot of praying, meditation and things of that sort in order to connect with God), but kept missing the mark. That's where her dissatisfaction came from. While I was still sad for this woman, (the movie is based off of an actual person who took this adventure, so it definitely makes things more real) I understood why she did all she did and why she felt so much disappointment. 

There was a time in my life when I thought if things didn't go a certain way, i.e. the way I wanted them to go, then my life would mean nothing. If I didn't go to my top choice law school, if I didn't get my dream job, if I didn't have a boyfriend, or I just wasn't "successful", then I thought my life would be a complete failure. Early on in my relationship with Jesus it terrified me to think that God's plans for my life may be different than my own. I, just like Liz, was searching for something different, something more or something better. 

I have a few friends who are like Liz (and me a few years ago!). They are always in search of something. Whether it be a man, or making "A"s or that perfect career, I have friends that are never satisfied with the life they have been given. While it saddens me that they are looking to fill a whole with all the wrong puzzle pieces, it also makes me extremely thankful. Right now, in my life, I am utterly and completely satisfied. By no means is everything perfect, but I have joy and that's all that matters. I am satisfied in all that the Lord has given me and the opportunities He has given me to serve His kingdom. Sure there are some things I still want. I still want to go to law school, and I still want to live in Washington, DC and sure a boyfriend would be great too. But if none of that happened, I would still be satisfied because I have Jesus Christ. He is all I really have and everything else is kind of like an added bonus. 

So, if you think your life is lacking, I pray that you find satisfaction in the only thing that can truly fulfill you. I pray that the Lord can fulfill you and that He gives you joy. Romans 12:2 says "Do not be conformed any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve of God's will, His good, pleasing and perfect will." That verse has never made more sense to me than it does now. We will never be satisfied with what this world has to offer to us, but with God, we can be transformed, and we can be satisfied with what He has in store for us. 

-Ashley