CHANGE

                                                             My parents and me after graduation.
                                                            We're too cool for school. Love them!

                                         A few of the awesome friends that have enriched my life

                                         so much these past four years.  

                                 

So many things have changed in the past month that my head starts to spin if I think about it too much. Most of it has been good and welcomed but some of it has been a difficult. Nonetheless, I've learned a lot from all the different things that have happened in the past few weeks.

The first and biggest change: I GRADUATED! It's weird to think of my self as no longer being in college. I recently went to the optometrist to get new glasses and more contacts. While filling out paperwork, I had a bit of an identity crisis when I had to fill in the blank for occupation. That's when it really hit me, I can no longer just jot in student. There are, of course, other changes that have come along with graduating. More than most of my friends are moving to different places, some are even moving to different countries and a few are even getting married. 

All of this means that life as I have known it for the past four years, is over. Now it's on to new opportunities and  different adventures. While all of this transitioning could really freak me out, it doesn't. I have come in contact with a few people in the same situation as me that haven't been so calm, cool and collected. I can't say that I blame them. There have been times that I've wanted to worry myself to death about what's going to happen in the future and how I'm going to handle it. The only thing that keeps me from literally going insane is my faith. I've come to realize that while most things in life are going to change as I grow older, there are a few things that stay the same.

First, God is unchanging. His character, His plan and everything about Him will always remain the same. This is extremely comforting to me. I cannot cling to the things of this world, because they are so fleeting. But the Lord and His promises are always the same. I can trust in Him and He is faithful. He is faithful in every situation. He is alpha and omega, the beginning and the end. I hold fast to this and this alone. 

Second, while my circumstances may change, my purpose doesn't. I was created to Glorify the Living God. I can do this in all situations and the Lord has given me the power to do so. Whatever I do in the future vocationally has no effect on my purpose in life. As long as I am looking to glorify the Lord in all that I do, I can't go wrong. Knowing all of this makes figuring out that next step so much easier. It's so freeing to know that my life is not defined by my salary or occupation. I find purpose in something much deeper than these things and this gives me unspeakable joy and peace. 

No matter what happens in life,The Lord is sovereign. Relationships may end and occupations may change, but the Lord doesn't. If you are in a period of transition, I hope this has been comforting and encouraging to you. Sometimes this is all that gets me through the day! 

The Lost Coin

I was reading my Bible earlier and came across this passage in Luke about the Parable of the Lost Coin. It's short, but I think it's so beautiful. Check it out.

"Or what woman, having ten silver coins if she loses one coin, does not light a lamp and sweep the house and seek diligently until she finds it? And when she has found it, she calls together her friends and neighbors, saying 'Rejoice with me, for I have found the coin that I had lost.' Just so, I tell you there is joy before the angels of God over one sinner who repents." Luke 15:8-10

I just love the imagery here. I like this passage because it's all about how awesome the gospel really is. Even Angels in Heaven celebrate when someone believes. Think about someone you know who isn't a Christian and how excited you would be if they told you they believed. It's just like that in Heaven. Anyway, this is just something to meditate on. Hope someone gets some use out of this.

-Ashley 

Resolve to:

I love the new year. It's probably one of my favorite times of the year. It's a fresh start and anything can change. Most people do this through making resolutions. It's ten days into the new year and many of us have already broken New Year resolutions. I'm not going to lie, I've broken almost every single one that I've made. I'll let you in on what I'm trying to change for this year.

1. Quit biting my nails. I have been a nail biter for as long as I can remember. My sophomore year I quit biting them for about a year but for one reason or another I started again when I was a junior. I'm determined to kick this bad habit this year. There's no reason for it and if I'm being honest, my nail biting is kind of disgusting.

2. Start running again/be active and eat healthy. Everyone has this resolution I know. I ran a lot my freshman and sophomore years because I didn't have any other outlet for physical activity. I absolutely love running. It can be painful because of how flat my feet are but it's so addicting. My hope is that by the end of this semester I can run a half-marathon.

3. Pray more. I struggle more with praying than anything else in my relationship with the Lord and I really want to improve on it. I love talking to my Heavenly Father but sometimes I just get sidetracked. There are a few other things that are encompassed in this resolution. In order for me to focus more on prayer I'm going to adjust some parts of my lifestyle, like watching less T.V., a lot less.

These are what I hope to improve upon for the year of 2011, but above all else I just want to fall more in love with the Lord and learn how to glorify Him better. My church here in Columbia had a Covenant Renewal Service last night. It was quite possibly the best thing I've ever done to kick off a new year. I was able to put Christ at the center of my new year and remember what my life is all about. My life is not my own, and I want to live with this in the forefront of my mind. I hope we can all resolve to follow the Lord and fall more in love with Him.

Ashley

Truly Blessed?

Remember back in August when I started this thing how I said that I wasn't sure why I was doing this? Remember how I said I would probably not be a good blogger? I hold fast to those statements. It has been a little over four months since my last post. That doesn't surprise me. I should have told you all that when I am in school, I kind of  get sidetracked. I get sidetracked a lot and my blog has definitely been something that I have neglected. Take heart, one of my new year resolutions is to be a better blogger! 

Now on to much more important things. In case you all haven't noticed, it's the holiday season, or it was. In these past few days people have been filled with Christmas cheer. On Christmas day, my Facebook newsfeed was flooded with my friends statuses celebrating the holiday and saying how truly blessed they are. In the moment, I echoed these thoughts and feelings of being blessed. Yet, now the more that I think about it, the more I question my own reasons for thinking/saying that I am blessed. Why do I think I'm blessed? Is it because of all the great gifts I got for Christmas? Is it because of all the awesome friends and family that I have? Is it because of my health? My family's wealth? Is it because of all the snow that South Carolina received this weekend? 

We as human-beings tend to think that the things that we have make us blessed. I asked myself this question: Would I continue to feel blessed if all of these "things" that I have all went away? What would I think if I didn't get anything for Christmas? What if I had no family or friends? What if I had cancer? Or I was homeless? I came to the conclusion that, yes I would still be blessed but not because of anything I have or because of who I am. It goes much deeper than all of that. 

None of the things mentioned above can, by themselves, make me blessed. I can't be blessed by anything I have or anything that I do. What really makes me blessed is the relationship I have with my Savior. I'm blessed because the Lord chose to bless me through the crucifixion of His son Jesus. I'm blessed because my sins are forgiven. I deserved hell, but because of what someone else has done for me I get to go to Heaven. That is what makes me and every other Christ follower truly blessed. 

Now I want to clarify something. I'm not saying that God cannot use these things to bless us. I would be a fool to think that I am not blessed by the relationships I have with other people. Yet the moment I begin to think that my friends by themselves are a blessing to my life, that's where I've gone wrong. I have to realize that what the Lord has chosen to bless me with is solely from Him and no one else. He should get all the glory for what I have been blessed with. Even if I was poor and sick I would still be blessed because I know my Savior and He has redeemed me. 

Why are you blessed? Is it because of what you have or who you know? Or is it because of who has saved you? My prayer for you is that you feel blessed because God has truly blessed you, not because of some possession you have. Job 1:21 says "God gives, God takes, God's name be ever blessed." I pray that no matter what your situation, that you know that being blessed comes from the Almighty God who chose to save us. 

Happy New Year, 

Ashley 

Satisfied

Yesterday, my mom and I went to see the movie "Eat, Pray, Love", starring Julia Roberts. While I thought the movie was great, it made me a little depressed. Julia Roberts' character, Liz, gives up her job, her husband and pretty much her whole life so she can go "find herself." She travels to Italy, India and Bali and lives in each country for an extended period of time. At each destination, Liz makes a new revelation either about herself, or life in general. I won't spoil the movie for those of you who want to see it, and have not yet had the chance to, but I will say this. No matter where Liz went, and no matter what she did, she was NEVER satisfied. She always wanted something more, or something different. 

This is where things got depressing for me, well at least for a little while. I was sad that someone who had such a rich life could be so unhappy, and she was mostly unhappy with herself. Then it hit me, while this character Liz was searching for herself, she also was searching for God (she did a lot of praying, meditation and things of that sort in order to connect with God), but kept missing the mark. That's where her dissatisfaction came from. While I was still sad for this woman, (the movie is based off of an actual person who took this adventure, so it definitely makes things more real) I understood why she did all she did and why she felt so much disappointment. 

There was a time in my life when I thought if things didn't go a certain way, i.e. the way I wanted them to go, then my life would mean nothing. If I didn't go to my top choice law school, if I didn't get my dream job, if I didn't have a boyfriend, or I just wasn't "successful", then I thought my life would be a complete failure. Early on in my relationship with Jesus it terrified me to think that God's plans for my life may be different than my own. I, just like Liz, was searching for something different, something more or something better. 

I have a few friends who are like Liz (and me a few years ago!). They are always in search of something. Whether it be a man, or making "A"s or that perfect career, I have friends that are never satisfied with the life they have been given. While it saddens me that they are looking to fill a whole with all the wrong puzzle pieces, it also makes me extremely thankful. Right now, in my life, I am utterly and completely satisfied. By no means is everything perfect, but I have joy and that's all that matters. I am satisfied in all that the Lord has given me and the opportunities He has given me to serve His kingdom. Sure there are some things I still want. I still want to go to law school, and I still want to live in Washington, DC and sure a boyfriend would be great too. But if none of that happened, I would still be satisfied because I have Jesus Christ. He is all I really have and everything else is kind of like an added bonus. 

So, if you think your life is lacking, I pray that you find satisfaction in the only thing that can truly fulfill you. I pray that the Lord can fulfill you and that He gives you joy. Romans 12:2 says "Do not be conformed any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve of God's will, His good, pleasing and perfect will." That verse has never made more sense to me than it does now. We will never be satisfied with what this world has to offer to us, but with God, we can be transformed, and we can be satisfied with what He has in store for us. 

-Ashley 

First Time for Last Chances

The best thing about being a senior in college: last chances. This whole week has been full of last chances. Sunday I went to USC's Bid Day festivities for all of the sororities on campus. I had never been, and it was quite the experience. The only event that can even come close to comparison is the running of the bulls in Spain. I am being completely serious when I say that. Every gamecock should experience the madness of Bid Day at least once, I promise it's worthwhile! I also ate some chicken fingers on Russell House's famous chicken finger Wednesday for the first time ever. I was a vegetarian for almost all of my three previous years in school, and by default, I always missed out. Let me tell you, they were definitely all that people had cracked them up to be!

The reason for me taking part in both of these events is simple. I don't have "next year" to do them. I only have this year, my senior year, the last year I will be a student at the University of South Carolina. It's now or never. I don't have the ability to just miss out because there's always next year. There is no next year for me, it's this year or not at all. So I plan to take advantage of my senior year and do all the things that I have been putting off since freshman, sophomore and junior year.

We have to take advantage of the time that we are given. If we don't, it will be gone all too soon. Then what are we left with? Psalm 90 says "Teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom." I hope that all of us can number our days, and live like it's senior year every year, no matter what the case. That's the only way to live. Go after your dreams. Conquer your fears. Tell your best friend who isn't a Christian about Jesus. Tell those who you're close with how much you care for them. Do all the things you've wanted to do, but haven't been able to because something has always held you back. Just do it (thanks Nike). You won't regret it.

That's how I'm spending this year, doing all the things I haven't done yet, and leaving (or walking across the stage to get my diploma!) without any regrets.

Until next time,
-Ashley

Be Still

This past week = craziness. I moved into my new apartment Sunday morning, and really haven't stopped "moving" since. I've had meetings, training sessions, more meetings and reunions with friends. While these past fews days have been an exciting start to a wonderful senior year, they also have been exhausting.

The first Campus Crusade for Christ (a campus ministry that I love and am heavily involved in) weekly meeting was tonight. Tons of people were there, and I must admit, I was not exactly looking forward to be surrounded by hundreds of people when I haven't gotten more than 5 hours of sleep last night and the night before last. This all changed when the praise band started playing. It was like the chaos that ensued this week just melted away. It was so refreshing to just be. I was able to take some time and praise God for being awesome and thank Him for another year of being able to serve Him at school.

This whole week I have stressing about how much I have to do this semester. I will be the first to admit I am an overachiever; I like to do well. I like to succeed and am very determined. I voluntarily put a lot on my plate. I've come to find out over the past year or so that's not what life's about. Someone once told me that we're not human doings, we're human beings. God doesn't want us to do anything but love Him and everyone, including myself can find peace and rest in Him.

One of my all time favorite Bible verses is Psalm 46:10, the whole Psalm  is great, but verse 10 is just phenomenal. It says, "Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the Nations, I will be exalted among the Earth." I encourage all of you doers, overachievers, worriers, type-A personalities and just busy people to be still. You don't have to do anything. Just rest. I plan to do that, or at least try to do that this semester. If you think about it, our very best efforts aren't good enough sometimes (or ever). I fail, and I fail a lot, we all do. So be thankful that God will be exalted, not because of anything that you or I do, but just because He's God and He's awesome. He's in control and all we have to do is acknowledge that.

So here's to a start of a brand new semester and a brand new school year. I hope we can all be still, at least once in awhile and just enjoy life.

Cheers,
Ashley